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SAN LUIS PASS — Severe weather season threatened to have an impact on the upcoming U.S. presidential election, as after making landfall in Texas, Tropical Storm Alberto immediately registered to vote as a Democrat.
The dangerous storm arrived from Mexico early Thursday morning, crossing into U.S. territory in south Texas, where it was greeted by members of the Department of Homeland Security, who quickly helped Alberto register as a Democrat in preparation for the November election.
“I’m here in search of a dream… and to leave a wake of devastation and death,” Tropical Storm Alberto said in a public statement after his arrival. “Right after I arrived, I was given a free iPhone, a meal, and papers to sign that would register me to vote as a Democrat in November. Gracias, Joe Biden!”
When questioned about Alberto’s arrival, a DHS spokesperson explained the process. “It’s our standard practice,” said Agent Burt Harbinson. “Whenever we welcome one of President Biden’s newcomers, we want them to feel at home here and ready to start their new life in the United States, which involves making sure they will be loyal Democrat voters from now on. We’re happy to have Alberto here and look forward to having his vote in November.”
Reports indicated Tropical Storm Alberto was also granted refugee status by the Biden administration and was in the process of being bused to New York by Texas Governor Greg Abbott.
At publishing time, the White House was torn between championing Tropical Storm Alberto as a triumph for Biden’s immigration policies or blaming Donald Trump for the destruction caused by the storm.